Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Agents are creative beings—they read, write, act, invent ways to torture aspiring writers—and sometimes their artistic vision is misunderstood by those around them, as was the case with Brooks Sherman and Julia Churchill.

Brooks Sherman: Agent at FinePrint Literary Management

Brooks Sherman loves hair bands—Whitesnake, Poison, Twisted Sister—and in 2006, he and his cousins formed the group Crystal Guardian, hoping to resurrect 80s metal. (Brooks is pictured in the upper right hand corner) Brooks played the triangle and was known as Gunter Star, the moody German rocker—he even perfected an accent. Crystal Guardian performed at several high school reunions, but the gigs fizzled out. The band blamed Gunter, saying his strange behavior on stage made the crowd uneasy. (He didn’t blink during performances and maintained direct eye contact with one audience member the entire show; his left peck flexed the rhythm of every song; he wept during his triangle solos; and at the end of the concerts, he’d lie on his back with his legs behind his head and fire blue darts at the crowd—the night he wore buttless chaps, he suffered third degree burns and was rushed to the hospital.) Gunter Star was voted out of the band and replaced by Claus Stone, a seventeen-year-old Austrian exchange student. If you’re interested in hiring Crystal Guardian for a Bar Mitzvah or a Quinceañera, call (201) 555-7667. Ask for Todd. 

 Julia Churchill: Agent at The Greenhouse Literary Agency

First, we would like to say that Julia Churchill ages extremely well. This photo was taken days before the television series "Star Trek: The Next Generation" began filming in 1987. Julia heard about an open casting call from Jonny Geller, who was a struggling actor at the time, and she decided to try out for the part of Lieutenant Tasha Yar—just for fun. To her delight, she got the role. After meeting the cast and crew and taking some promotional photos, she sat down with the show’s writers. They described their vision of her character and told her she would have a sexual encounter with Lt. Commander Data, an Android, in episode 3. Julia was enthusiastic about promoting human/robot relations and insisted on full frontal nudity for both her and Lt. Commander Data. The writers explained to her that nudity wasn’t a possibility. She told them it would be tastefully done, but they wouldn’t budge—prudes. Ultimately, Julia gave up the role citing artistic differences. (Agents Gone Wild agrees with Julia. Episode 3 would have been so much better with full frontal nudity.) 

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